Coffee Experiment #1: How Many Cups Does It Take For JPR To Spontaneously Combust
I am bored. I am sitting here with absolutely nothing to do except babysit this hunk o’ metal (for any engineers reading this, we have yet to leave idle). For lack of anything better to do, I have decided to conduct an experiment in coffee drinking. What is the hypothesis you ask? Well let me tell you….hmmm. How’s this?
“After shit loads of coffee, jpr will no longer be bored”
We will start the experiment at 6:30 PM
Data Collection:
“After shit loads of coffee, jpr will no longer be bored”
We will start the experiment at 6:30 PM
Data Collection:
6:30 PM
Cups of Coffee: 0
Subject: Eyelids are a little heavy, legs are a little crampy from the gym today, definitely bored.
6:45 PM
Cups of Coffee: 1
Subject: Eyelids still heavy, legs still crampy, still bored.
7:00 PM
Cups of Coffee: 2
Subject: Awake. Only slightly less bored because now I have to pee.
7:30 PM
Cups of Coffee: 4
Subject: A litttle jittery/. I don’t think that I am all that bored right now. I think its because Im writing this though. I suppose that I will continue the experiment for the sake of science. Who knows? Maybe I will win a Nobel Prize. I have to pee agin.
8:00 PM
Cups of Coffee: 6
Subject: OH MY GOD! SOMEBODY SLIP ME A ROOFY, I NEEDf TO STOP VIBRATING!
Update: It is 9:45 and I think that I am crashing. I would not suggest doing this experiment for yourself. It is only entertaining until the alien pops out of your stomach. On the other hand, if you are bored….go ahead. In that case, succumb to the siren call of the Starbucks marketing machine and drink shit loads of coffee.
Here is the results summary and conclusion for this astoundingly professional and scientific experiment.
Results Summary:
The subject seemed to get edgy after the third cup of coffee, had to pee a lot and forgot about being bored very quickly once the alien popped out of his stomach.
Conclusion:
I need help
Cups of Coffee: 0
Subject: Eyelids are a little heavy, legs are a little crampy from the gym today, definitely bored.
6:45 PM
Cups of Coffee: 1
Subject: Eyelids still heavy, legs still crampy, still bored.
7:00 PM
Cups of Coffee: 2
Subject: Awake. Only slightly less bored because now I have to pee.
7:30 PM
Cups of Coffee: 4
Subject: A litttle jittery/. I don’t think that I am all that bored right now. I think its because Im writing this though. I suppose that I will continue the experiment for the sake of science. Who knows? Maybe I will win a Nobel Prize. I have to pee agin.
8:00 PM
Cups of Coffee: 6
Subject: OH MY GOD! SOMEBODY SLIP ME A ROOFY, I NEEDf TO STOP VIBRATING!
Update: It is 9:45 and I think that I am crashing. I would not suggest doing this experiment for yourself. It is only entertaining until the alien pops out of your stomach. On the other hand, if you are bored….go ahead. In that case, succumb to the siren call of the Starbucks marketing machine and drink shit loads of coffee.
Here is the results summary and conclusion for this astoundingly professional and scientific experiment.
Results Summary:
The subject seemed to get edgy after the third cup of coffee, had to pee a lot and forgot about being bored very quickly once the alien popped out of his stomach.
Conclusion:
I need help
