Snails Should Ooze, Not People.

OK. Maybe I’m a little high strung at times. Maybe I go around in too much of hurry. However, even after making these concessions, there is no way anybody can defend how ridiculously slow some people can be when you get out in the Southern Sticks. I know that I can be impatient so when I am behind Agnes in the WAL MART Express Lane I try not to get upset when she tries to pay for her entire basket of groceries w/ nothing but change. I even manage to take a cab to my happy place when she insists on bagging her own groceries while recounting tales of her new stupid ass dog. But when she continues to hold up the line when she should be moving toward the door…my happy place starts to get a little warm. I mean, come on woman! Im freaking hungry and I need to get food. Get the hell out of the way! Do I actually say this? No, of course not. But surely Agnes can see the steam coming out of my @#$%#!$!! ears. Take a hint woman…LEAVE.

If that had been the first time, I might not have gotten so steamed. The thing is, every other time I get in a line in this town there is inevitably somebody just oozing along at the speed of snail splooge. So, if you are prone to oozing, please consider the following. If you want to mosey along, fine. I like to mosey sometimes too. But if there are people behind you, please realize that they might not want to waste the next ten minutes waiting on you to count change. At the very least, lay off the pennies. WAL MART likes quarters too you know.