Can You Hear Me Now? Did You Really Want To?

I hate not having service on my cell phone. So, it is lucky for me that the base that I am currently working on has ZERO service. As an added bonus, my cell phone doesn't work in the surrounding areas either. This makes communicating w/ friends difficult....above and beyond the fact that they never seem to pick up the phone when I am calling. We won't dwell on that though (Actually this is all a lie. I rarely call anyone; I hate phones...but I still want the option of making my short little phone calls when I want) . To make matters worse, on my birthday I completely lost my voice (obviously not my fault..just don't look at the b-day pics posted previously) and now I have a ton of phone calls that I need to return because I didn't pick up the phone for ~2 days. In an effort to re-establish communications I have considered the following options:

1) Smoke Signals: This is a time tested manner of communicating but the long distance rates are hell. Wood isn't cheap you know.

2) The Pony Express: They went out of business more than a century ago; who knew?

3) Landline: This seems plausible in theory but you need a calling card for personal calls outside of the base...which I have of course left in CT. I suppose I could buy a calling card at Wal Mart or something but that doesn't help me right now.

4) Lets face it, we all know that I don't have the attention span to come up with a fourth option.

SOOOooooo, short story long (at least longer than it needs to be) I will be hard to reach when I am working. That is all.